The Ralph Report STORE

Books! Merch! Garmy-approved stuff!
Welcome to the newly expanded Ralph Report Store—home to TRR merchandise, Queen J’s books, and assorted things we think you might enjoy.

NEW RELEASE!!!

DEAD LETTERS: FISH OUT OF WATER

A NEW DARKLY COMIC SCIENCE-FICTION ADVENTURE

THESE ARE THE RULES: YOU HAVE TO LAST.

Honey is seventeen and very good at seeming invisible.

Roosevelt is twenty-three and has a double master’s degree in grifting and sarcasm.

When the two meet, we question the author’s decision.

Soon they’re tearing through a Southern California that looks slightly different from the one we know, yet everyone still knows who Céline Dion is. Bar fights. Delicious microbrews. A scruffy dog—people love a dog moment. Acquiring life lessons and things that technically belong to other people.

DEAD LETTERS: FISH OUT OF WATER is an irreverent, darkly comic science-fiction adventure about colliding worlds, unlikely connections, and two women who are excellent at leaving.

Staying?

Yeah. They’re going to need to work on that.

Book One of the Dead Letters series. For mature teen and adult readers.

KINDLE EBOOK AVAILABLE NOW!
PAPERBACK OUT NOW!

RETURN TO SENDER. WORLD UNKNOWN.

CALM & CREATIVE

The #1 New Release in Activity Books on Amazon

Turn simple shapes into something unexpected.

Calm & Creative features 100 drawing prompts designed to get you creating without worrying about getting it “right.” Part drawing challenge, part creative reset, it’s made for artists, non-artists, doodlers, overthinkers, and anyone who could use a little more making and a little less judging.

100 prompts. No artistic experience required. Just pick up a pencil and see what happens.

“This isn’t just a drawing book—it’s a permission slip to think weird, follow your curiosity, and actually make something. If you’ve ever said ‘I’m not creative,’ this book proves you wrong in the best possible way.”
— Kevin Smith, director of Clerks